2020 : new decade

^^


1st February 2020, 1:41A.M.
Image result for hd photography aesthetic neon aesthetic pink laptop walppaepr"
a little me waving hi to Feb 2020, and bye to Jan 2020 


     Hello. It's me again. Finally it's 2020. A new year, a new decade. A 22 years old me. Uh oh! A new month too. To summarize my trial month for this new year, I could say it went well. Gonna be a fourth year student on spring semester after this omg I'm not ready >:( Well well, Imma just put that aside and enjoy my 2 months holiday. Unfortunately, I'm not returning to my country. I had one night that I suddenly missed home, family and friends but then I checked the flight ticket only to see that damn it's already expensive I'M NOT GOING HOME. I'm grateful enough they're active on WhatsApp and always there when I need them. <3

     Back to my university life. I finished my final examination two days ago. 4 papers. I was actually aiming for at least 3.9 for this semester but then hehe if I just could pass all papers that would be enough for me lmao. I messed up software engineering mid sem test. That was because I had to take two papers on that day and I only focused on the other one (electromagnetism) which was surprisingly easier that what I was expected. 残念だったなあ。。。However, I guess I did well for other subjects. Let me share you this one thing. Before the day of examination, I always call or send text to my mum;

Me     : Ma, tomorrow i got test, can you please doa for me? Hehe!
Mum : yes sure, I always doa for you lah, everyday after solat i always doa for my children, but you also need to doa for yourself too.
Me     : hehe okay mama i will but you dont forget to pray for me tau.
Mum : iye comel, i always pray that you will be the best of the bests. 

     She once wrote a letter for me; "I hope you will always be the best of the bests" during my spm and that's how I ended being top 1 in school at the very last moment of my school life. I always believe that dua especially the one that come from your mum can be very powerful. That why I will always tell her to dua for me eventhough she always did but I will always tell her to do so. Just in case, she can doa more hagagahaggahgha. But! I once read something about this thing. Someone said "my mom is my tempat bergantung harap because her doa and support, i cannot imagine living without her" but then someone said to her " but someone said to her "dont just put your pergantungan to your mum only. don't forget Allah"

Jangan kamu letak pergantungan kepada harta, kerana apabila harta hilang, kamu yang akan sengsara. Jangan kamu letak pergantungan kepada manusia, kerana apabila manusia hilang, kamu juga yang akan sengsara. Tetapi letaklah sepenuh pergantungan dirimu kepada Dia. Siapakah Dia? Dia adalah Allah SWT. ( اللَّهُ الصَّمَدُ) tempat pergantungan sekelian makhluk. Mohonlah pertolonganNya
لاَ حَوْلَ وَلاَ قُوَّةَ إِلاَّ بِاللَّهِ.
"Tiada daya dan upaya melainkan pertolongan Allah"
Maka kamu tidak akan sengsara. Wallahu'alam
Pesan Imam Ibn Qayyim :
"Janganlah bebankan dirimu dengan kerisauan tentang dunia kerana urusan dunia milik Allah. Janganlah bebankan dirimu dengan kerisauan tentang rezeki kerana rezeki datang dari Allah. Janganlah bebankan dirimu dengan kerisauan tentang masa depan kerana masa depan di Tangan Allah. Apa yang engkau perlu risau hanyalah satu perkara sahaja, iaitu bagaimana engkau membuat Allah redha kerana sekiranya engkau membuat Allah redha Dia akan redha padamu. Apabila Dia redha padamu Dia akan melindungimu dan mencukupkan keperluanmu." 
credit to : @medandakwah

     Moving on to next, just to express another part of my little feeling! For 2020;

-To be healthier of course!
-To lose fat again (cliche goals) so i can wear pretty clothes without any worries!
-To meet snow too!  snow fall outside today but only tiny I can barely saw them.
-To have better skin too; flawless, glowing and what else? xD
-To have better outfits lol i noticed my fashion are boring i need some fresh style
-To have better communication with people in malay, english and japanese also.


     Last but not least, to have a life with more positive vibes inside. My heart broke in 2019 and I had enough. I mean yes I don't want to spend my 2020 healing. My healing time is over. I did really well forgetting, forgiving and deleting all those stuffs. It took like almost half a year to heal. I don't want to experience that anymore. But somehow I have no regret. I take that as lesson too and that also referring the same thing like what i said before this. "Letak pengharapan jangan pada orang, tapi pada Allah". That's what they said to me too. I will never forget those good things about that but I will definitely leave and never look back. 

Bye. 



Thanks for reading! :D

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You did amazingly good and I’m so proud of you.🌸

 
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